When I’m out with the girls I attract a lot of people. Just like when Little Man was a baby and people seemed to rub his hair for luck, I find I’m now regularly stopped and asked questions. One of the best things about this though, is the secret squad that just belongs to parents of multiples.
People will often say “I know exactly what it feels like”, or they tell me about their twins and what it was like for them. I’m genuinely fascinated by these stories and I ask questions too, eager for the knowledge from these “survivors”.
“What did you do about daytime naps? What were they like at school? Do they get on? Do they dress similar?” the list is endless! I find myself chatting for ages sometimes, forgetful that I’m out running errands or have a need to get to an appointment.
Last week at the hospital after Fen’s Occupational Therapy assessment, we sat down to feed her her lunch and got talking to a hospital worker who appeared to be waiting for someone. She told me about her twins who are fourteen now, how they had four older siblings meaning she had six kids under six at home. My jaw dropped. And here is me complaining that I’m so busy with three! I asked if she had much family support back then and she said no, not really. I looked at her and thought, well if you can do it, then so can I! I wanted to hug her, it was like inadvertent encouragement in a nutshell.
I asked if all her kids get on and she responded quickly and firmly – “oh yes”. How did you manage that? I asked, surely it’s difficult with so many personalities and close teenage ages. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about her reply:
If you hurt one of us, it hurts all of us. A success for one is a success for all.”
And that was it. Simple but so unbelievably powerful. I’ve adopted it as my new family mantra.
And that was that, her friend showed up, we did the secret handshake and went on our way! K x