It’s true. With my Post Natal Depression (PND) I do get good days and good moments in bad days. I think acknowledgement of that fact is important.
I still smile, laugh and love. I still get joy from choosing the girls outfits or chatting to Little Man about his day. I’m able to acknowledge the comfort of snuggling with a babe at 3am can bring, especially when all the neighbourhood is quiet. I can relax by patting Oscar and there is a certain happiness I get from keeping the home running. I’m still witty as hell and get excited by small things.
I can still walk, talk and take care of myself and others. I’m functioning – highly functioning – nearly everyday. I’m not out of control, I’m not sobbing myself to sleep, I’m not acting “crazy”.
I look forward to the future, both near and far. I think about finishing my photography study, house renovations and writing a book. I have long-term plans.
I love my children, my husband, my cat, my home, family and friends and my life as a whole. This illness just makes me feel a little lost at the moment. But I’ll get there, I know the fog will eventually clear and my days won’t be defined by naming them as good or bad, happy or sad. They’ll just simply be called days and I look forward to that.
I guess what I’m trying to say is that I’m still me. Depression comes in many forms and is an illness, it’s not a person.