Last week it was reported that Beyonce and Jay-Z have hired not one, not two but THREE nannies for each of their new twin babies. According to the media the babes sleep at different times which obviously equates to needing a steady rotation of staff working eight hour shifts. For their older daughter, Blue, they apparently have two nannies. Which makes me ask the question, how involved are the parents?
As much as I can appreciate and empathize with the need for a nanny, especially with multiples, if we do include the parents in our basic calculations then that’s TEN people looking after three children. If we take the assumption that the parents are not heavily involved, which has it’s own set of questions, then that’s still eight adults. Is it just me that thinks that’s slightly excessive?
Even though it probably sounds like I am, I actually don’t mean to knock their decision, after all, what’s right for one family isn’t necessarily a good fit for another. This motherhood journey has taught me to never judge another parent, I am genuinely curious, however. Employing that kind of help is a completely foreign concept to me. Having grown up in a very bog-standard way, and what I mean by that is a mum and dad who worked long hours but still did everything for me; my mind literally boggles at not giving a similar experience for my offspring.
Whilst I can only imagine the incredibly busy lives that Bey-Z have, I’m left wondering numerous things about the rich and famous that take this route. Like, how do they bond with their children? Do they actually change nappies? Do they ever experience sleepless nights? Do they pick and choose what essential care they do for their kids? Where are the grandparents, siblings and extended family?
More importantly, and rightly or wrongly, I’ve never really understood the point in having children if they’re going to be cared for by someone else. Obviously there are exceptions to this rule like illness and a need to work but where is the line? Is there such a thing as too much help?
IT’S ALL THE LITTLE THINGS
As difficult as it has been thus far, I wouldn’t trade anything because this is what parenting is. It’s sleepless nights, it’s poopy on fingers, it’s wholeheartedly appreciating solo hot showers. It’s feeling the magic in those moments during the middle of the night where it’s just you and your baby and the rest of the neighbourhood is quiet. It’s crying from exhaustion and it’s feeling on top of the world because you’ve had six hours continuous sleep. It’s getting to know your child – the fun times, the scary bits and the tantrums. It’s understanding their mood and what they mean when they point and say that word you still can’t figure out but seem to know what they want anyway.
It’s feeling frustrated when you’ve made a meal and they immediately throw it on the floor. It’s being told you are loved for the first time. It’s being the one that they not only want, but need at 3am. It’s being reached for by short arms and a sleepy head resting on your shoulder. It’s all of their firsts and all of their lasts.
It’s that ol’ fashioned simple parenting. The good, the bad and the total outlandish.
Even if I could afford a nanny, it’s not for me. A cleaner yes, but the other stuff? Well, that’s all mine.