I didn’t like my children today.”
This might seem like such a horrible and fairly controversial thing to say – let alone put out on t’internet for all to see. But, I have to be honest. This morning, I didn’t, the girls at least. You see, Copperhead has been sleeping horrendously. Well, I say sleeping when really I mean waking at ridiculous hours throughout the night; screaming, hitting the bedroom door and basically waking up everyone within a five mile radius.
WHY WON’T YOU SLEEP?
Around 11pm last night she woke. So, after an hour of giving milk, trying good cop/bad cop and the cry it out method; Hubby understandably became frustrated. Surprisingly I was able to keep my cool (thanks meds). I tried holding Copperhead, rocking her slightly, even feigning sleep in her cot. Now, this actually would have worked because she did get really calm, but Little Red was fully awake and in party mode.
We did the last thing we could think of, and that was begrudgingly bringing the girls into our bed. The worry in this is that it can so quickly become a habit and having one octopus and a starfish in with us really doesn’t equate to a good night sleep. So, after ushering a poor, confused and slightly cranky Little Man back to bed, Hubby made a nest out of couch cushions in the living room while I tried to sleep with the twins.
It didn’t go down as you might have thought. There will be no cute photos with a tiny foot lodged into my spine and an eye being playfully gouged.
They. Did. Not. Sleep.
No. In fact they both went walk about, pulled the cover off me and high-fived each other. Repeatedly.
What followed was another bottle of milk, resetting all of the sleep cues and then listening to Copperhead cry and rattle her bedroom door handle like an extra from The Walking Dead. It stopped after about an hour. Thankfully Michael and I were both able to get in a tight hour and a half before she started up again at 4:30am.
KEEP CALM & GET THROUGH THE DAY
Instead of living the party lifestyle of going food shopping and letting the girls run off their energy at a soft play area, I had a pyjama day.
I got the girls dressed, several times. Made them breakfast, changed their nappies, helped them wash their hands a thousand different ways before caving and refusing to do more than the bare minimum.
The clock could not get to nap time fast enough and the nights antics were taking a serious toll on their moods. It went from mania to utter depression, anger at the toast that was so obviously spread wrong, to euphoria at another change of t-shirt.
Little Red ended up crashing hard just after her early lunch and I ended up dream feeding her on the couch! Who knew you could do that to a two year old? Copperhead was still full of beans (HOW?) and tried to smuggle a cat into her bed at nap time. They still didn’t really stop there as I heard chatting for half an hour before blissful silence that should resemble the night.
I took the opportunity to do a bit of cleaning, have something to eat and just as I sat on my bed for a tiny siesta I heard that dreaded noise.
Copperhead was awake… again.
BACKTRACKING BECAUSE THEY’LL READ THIS ONE DAY
So, you see, it’s not as if I didn’t like my children. It’s more that I didn’t like the complete and utter torture I was being subjected to. I didn’t like their anti-social behaviour, their biting or defiance over the simplest of requests. I mean, it’s not unreasonable to ask, very politely I might add, to not turn the oven on (again) in order to burn the house down. Thank Gawd for the fact our house is completely built of asbestos is all I can say. The neighbours and surrounding acres of pristine bushland may suffer but at least we’ll be okay.
To summarise, because I’m not too sure where this post is going, I’m not too sure I enjoyed being a parent today. But I’m here, writing this post and generally feeling okay. Pretty jovial, actually.
Through the exhaustion, frustration at dealing with SO MANY tantrums and general lack of the will to live, I still love the little munchkins. I know there will be a time where I look back at this period and laugh. Oh how we’ll laugh.
Today was not that day.
Disclaimer: Much of this post is written in jest!